Soldier

Understanding by the general populace is irrefutably impossibly,

An enigma amongst the pawns on a monochromatic board,

Etched with beautiful scars and green strength,

This jaded player delves in history, mystery, and war’s great fruits.

 

Emerald rook slides against granite, polishing and grating,

Hiding dark secrets as he moves through life’s choreography,

Attainable goals distant and fraught with emotional peril,

Parallel and perpendicular choices lend visibility to cynical eyes.

 

Experience of life’s horrible and violent facets have left

Aching, festering, plunging sores screaming with memories,

Sunshine hours and moonlit nights filled with inescapable reactions,

Veteran anguish and pride unfulfilled and begging for release.

 

Chest out, standing tall in halls of horror and comedy,

Valorous awards, medals, and stars shining with pride,

He adjusts his beret, rolls his shoulders, and balls his fists,

Handsome, strong, and mouth quirked for epic adventures.

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Nightmares and Memories

It never ceases, this nightly fixation to strive for wakefulness

An obsession that has haunted my soul for eternity,

Sinister and delicious, the ebon wolf is my companion as I fall,

Sauntering underneath the dark heavens, dancing in spaces between stars.

 

They say that old souls can inhabit new bodies,

Desires and weaknesses inexplicable and unexplainable,

Taking root deep in the loins and sending tendrils to heart’s bottom,

Imparting scrumptious shivers and gooseflesh throughout.

Teeth scrape and bite, nails like claws down my spine,

Vise-grip on my throat, as a distant wail of sheer terror echoes,

Silken petals caress as briar thorns send rivulets of crimson cascading,

Pleasure filled with pain and fear, relentless and enigmatic arousal.

 

Vivid and vivacious, tales of great woe, great love, and great pain,

Leaving me gasping for more and shuddering from it in the same breath,

Nipples harden in lust and trepidation, fingers grasp sheets with white knuckles,

Reliving and inventing malefic tales of spine-shattering impact and smirking demons.

 

Feel the blood trail down my face and between my breasts,

Lift hands scarlet with guilt and shaking with shock, world gone opaque,

Stumble to feet, pebbles in soles, boulders in souls, world gone into Twilight,

Others that perceive the world in different levels of reality, eyes of experience.

 

Burnt forests and smoking flesh assail my nostrils as I trudge through dreamland,

Seeking a reprieve from Sandman’s gifts, nightmares and memories one and the same,

Eyes wide shut, my ebon wolf appears, ears pricked and fur slick with my tears,

Guiding me to plunge beneath the warm lagoon’s surface into blessed, exhausted oblivion.

Soul’s Window

Eyes shut, sounds of others’ movements all around,

The wind howling through the shoddy casing of the window,

Like the gasping screams that dig and scratch at my throat,

Create the nightly aura that fills the darkest time.
 

My emotions run rampant, inner turmoil seeking a way OUT,

Dark roots, thick and mobile, writhe like snakes in my lower back,

Containing all nightmares, past regrets, and dark desires of life,

Flooding my body with a sinister purpose, evil and beautiful.
 

Temptation taunts the twisted soul, masochistic release in grasp,

And the trunk undulates with a malefic sensuality, lifting arms in joy,

Branches rustle, bare limbs brushing each other, before disappearing,

Diving back into the flesh whence they came, burying deep.
 

Satisfied moonlight sheds a sassy twilight on the scene,

Soft grays, stark blacks, bark you can almost touch, roughened from abuse,

A sheen of sweat trickles down my back, lending rain to the display,

As fear and lush heat quicken my breathing, dreading and anticipating.
 

The moonlight shifts, and there’s an ornate, iron-bound door in shadow,

A small key hidden among branches, suspiciously just out of reach to any passersby,

To unlock the door to all of my secrets, to plunge down to the depths of the roots,

The morbid shadow that is my soul, kept prisoner among the façade of bark.

 

Branches stretch, grow, reaching for salvation, reaching for light and air,

Blessed water from the sky, laughter and love, the fruits of life,

Cool, dark earth to build a foundation, celestial sights for guidance,

The wind sighs its satisfaction as the fluffy clouds gather and shed tears.

 

A finger brushes an amber liquid’s drop from my shadowed face in the trunk,

A huge shudder rocks the tree, wallowing in despondency, eyes close, jaw goes slack,

Ephemeral beauty shines down, caressing and easing tension, dreamland slides close,

Strength to stand, lift chin and branches, bury deep into rocky soil, and reach for salvation.

   Sometimes the brightest light comes from the darkest of places.

Twilight Love

In the dark of the night

your soul glows like an ember

Be still, my child, dawn is coming

 

A small flame ignites,

creating a halo of warm love

in the embrace of mysterious twilight

 

Drift on a cloud of dreams

Let the them cradle you, as I do

Shush now, my child, Mama’s here

 

Let Sleep take you into a miraculous land

Opening your mind to impossible realities

as I watch you smile and close your eyes

 

 

7/07

Tears of Joy

Tears of joy

for this little boy

change my soul forever.

 

At the first touch

I didn’t feel so much

as I do now

 

When I screamed

my release to the beams

as I gripped with white knuckles.

 

He slipped from my womb

into the sterile birthing room

I sighed with relief and watched

 

As they took my little boy away

and said he could not stay

and the worst pain occurred

 

It was neither contractions

nor the actual birth happening

nor even the placenta being born

 

It was the doctor and those hands

as then up, up, and up

and squeezed my raw uterus

 

But as I put him to my breast

and lay down for much-needed rest

Anything is worth it for my child

A Mama’s Path

Seasons come, and seasons go, a revolving door of picture frames:

 

Dappled sunlight illuminates the inner glow of a child’s smile,

Towers of flame reflect a teenager’s heartache and clenched fists,

Sparkling snowflakes kiss the tumultuous skin, seeking celestial guidance,

Burgeoning bulbs breach newly packed earth of a soul’s resting place.

 

Within these seasons is contained life’s shared joys and sorrows,

All beings have seasons of bright sunlight and snow-clad winter rays,

Children will cry, giggle, and think no sweets is the end of the world,

But through thick and thin, they will seek mama’s comforting arms and soft words.

 

From the moment of conception, a reservoir of strength is conjured in one’s breast,

For sleepless nights and dirty diapers, colossal messes and seemingly endless tears,

A quiet patience and calm humor is developed and nurtured

For bug-hunting and reckless abandon, snips and snails and puppy dog tails.

 

Upon this path to guide your newborn, eyes shining bright with innocence and trust,

A realm of refreshing discoveries and ingenuous laughter surrounds,

Rose-colored glasses perch upon your nose again, rejoicing at each smile and step:

You are enveloped in the age-old cycle of life and rebirth. Enjoy, Mama.

Torrential Torment

Out of the womb of pleasure is born

Squalling babes, innocent and pure,

Arriving to travel on a round-trip journey

Back to the Abyss from which they came.

 

The road of life curves and curls,

Twisting and splintering like fractals,

Songs of heartbreaking woe weave a melody

With intertwining verses of joyous remembrances.

 

A lonesome figure wanders the path it has chosen,

Vision blurry from the hammering rains,

Its feet slogging through the muddy excrement,

Gusts of cold wind whip its rags into stinging eyes.

 

In shock, cold and numb from life-changing events,

Putting one foot in front of the other, one at a time,

Visions, memories, and dreams howl through the chaos

That is its mind, unable to pause, meditate, gather wits.

 

 

 

 

In a daze, the figure looks up blearily as

Gravel rapidly leads the way to boulders

That start rolling and bouncing down the steep incline.

Unable to dodge, the figure is knocked into the filth.

 

Screaming, screaming, screaming

Hands clutching, breath gasping, lungs empty

From the vocal release of overwhelming emotions,

Nose plugged with mud, can’t regain breath.

 

Stop.

Exhale, open mouth, inhale slowly.

Jaw clenched, chin raising defiantly, held up despite

The wind’s punches, rain’s clawing, and excrement’s dragging.

 

Bright eyes flash open, determined and adamant.

Fists clench, white knuckled and taut with strength.

Shoulders square, unruly muscles rippling.

Stands tall, heedless of the torrential torment,

And screams with heart and soul:

“I WILL NOT YIELD!”